Okay, first off, a disclaimer, in my sitch I have done things differently. My situation is a little different, due to the fact that we were already pretty much living apart for four years already, before BD.
Now, that said, lol, I agree. Do not make yourself too available. Make your home with Ds a place she wants to be. What does that require from you? Keeping it tidy? Always being fun and cheerful when she pops by? "Oh, we are just headed to the park"....when an unannounced visit comes.
She has to want to be there and of course, want to be with you. But she also has to stand on her own, because it is what she wanted.
Just now, do I get hints of H missing this place (interspersed with he loves his) and once in a while, hints through his emails etc. that it perhaps wasn't him letting us all go that will make him happy....
This can be a time of true growth for you both, but you have to let it happen. For you and for her.
