Okay, well -
he came home last night - his stuff isn't all here yet, so I don't really feel like he's living there yet - more just visiting. We went grocery shopping together, came home, put S to bed, and hung out and watched The Surreal Life (we think it's really funny - tasteless, but funny).
I thought there wouldn't be any R talk, but there was a bit. We were kind of watching TV, and a preview for 7th Heaven came on (I occasionalyl watch it), andI remarked that one of the main characters left her husband because he dropped out of medical school. H said "How do people just leave?"
WTF? Where was he six months ago when he walked out the door and said "I want a divorce, I can't stand you, you make me feel crazy..."
I said "But you did kind of just leave."
H: "I didn't ever really leave. I moved out to give us both some space, because we were about to kill each other."
I let it drop here, but this is NOT how he presented the sitch to me six months ago - and conveniently dropped from this little take on it was any mention of the little hoochie. I didn't throw a fit, and I didn't prusue it any further, but I find it interesting that this is how he perceives the sitch - I guess in his mind he sparates the moving out and the affair - the A as something that was wrong (he's never denied that), and the S as something he did for us, with no real intention of ever divorcing me?
Oh, hell - who cares - I'll let him look at it that way. It did turn out to be good for us, and it did give us some much-needed space. If nothing else, it tells me that he views this as a long-term commitment, and not soemthing that's just going to disappear at any moment.
Wish he'd let me in on this - I still remember the phone call to me at the hospital where he said "You're there because we're getting a divorce and you can't accept that." I was actually there because I was being HUGELY overmedicated and misdiagnosed, and it probably contributed to my out-of-control behavior/crazymaking/etc. Bleagh - interesting how the WAS mind works, isn't it?
Befuddled and Bamboozled,
Myrrh

One moment of patience may ward off great disaster. One moment of impatience may ruin a whole life.