My new normal (she has moved out)

[Grizz]

Man have the last several days been crazy. First of all, I can't thank everyone on here enough for the support and encouragement. I haven't been posting as much recently because it has been so hectic with the move, the kids, work etc. However, I have definitely continued to read all of the posts that I have received. They have been very uplifting. Thank you again.

As you know, W has moved out. She is very torn however. She is very confused (as am I) and now says that she thinks she may have made a mistake. She told me she loved me 2 days ago (first time in months). She asked me last night to stay at her apartment with her (I did). Very confusing for everyone involved. The girls were asleep when I stayed and I was up before them. They don't know I stayed. Likely very confusing to them if they saw that.

Now with that said, I realize that alot of this talk can just be fear, regret or many others things. It doesn't necessarily mean that she wants to work on anything. I HAVE to stay guarded with my feelings. I cannot allow myself to take the mental beating that I took several months ago. BUT, this is the first time that she has ever even mentioned anything about US in the past 6 months. I will take that as a good sign but have no expectations of anything. She signed a six month lease so the next six months should be very interesting. There will be alot of continued growth over that time period.

The girls have done fairly well. D8 asked my last night if I was going to be OK staying by myself. She also asked me if i would be sad if she liked Mom's new apartment. Things like that just break my heart. But all in all, I think that are doing well.

I still want my wife and family back!

On to other things. Our city wide softball tournament starts tomorrow. We won our division. Finished the regular season 8-1. Hopefully we will have a good showing in the tournament.
I am playing golf on Saturday. Then Sunday, the entire family, along with another family, is going to an amusement park. Should be fun. I am finally at the point to where I can have fun when W is around. I have not been able to do that in a long time. I was always too sad. It is nice to slowly get away from that.

There will be rough days ahead. Some worse than others but I just hope and pray that my future will be with my 3 wonderful ladies.

Again, thanks for the support (keep it coming) and please continue to pray for us.