"I Love you but love her too"....WHAT?

[Notlikingthis]

Snodderly, at least your xh had the sense to use something that would hold more than a paperbag. I have a feeling that this is going to take him weeks to do and that he is doing it purposefully. I don't think he really wants to leave but is being pulled by a force beyond his control.

He seems to be slowly saying goodbye with his behavior. The guilt seems to be manifesting itself in different ways. This morning after he got up and showered he came back into the bedroom and stood over me. I felt him there but didn't open my eyes. He leaned down, kissed me, smoothed my hair down with his hand and whispered I love you. It took every ounce of strength that I had to keep my eyes closed and act as if I was sleeping. I wanted to burst into tears but held back until after I was sure he was gone.

He's hired someone to do the yardwork, left a bundle of cash for me to use in case I need it for emergencies and hired someone to paint the exterior of the house. We built this home just 5 years ago as our retirement home and it doesn't need to be painted! Last night he told me that he was goining to be spending Wednesday night at the new house but that I was welcome at the new house whenever I wanted and didn't need an invitation. Hmmm, he didn't offer a key so I guess I'll have to call ahead just as he will when he comes here. I don't think I'll be visiting him anytime soon.

His behavior is also causing him some issues at work. He's just been back at work for 6 weeks and he told me that he made a huge mistake that could cost him his job. He's doing damage control and hopes that it's recoverable. Apparently he overstepped his bounds and took control of someone else's project which is typical for him....taking control of everything that he's involved in. Anyway, it would be a wakeup call for him to be let go. He works at a company that employs people with very big egos. That's part of the reason why he was tired of working for this particular company but then turned around a year later and took them up on their offer to come back. If he weren't in the state of mind he is in he would have turned them down flat when they offered.

Thanks again for the reminder about things disappearing when you're not looking. I know that he will be back for more things as time goes on. I really don't want to put a time limit on when he needs to get everything that he wants out of the house but I have a feeling that I will eventually have to do that. The locksmith will be here tomorrow instead of today. Oh well, I should be back home by the time he gets off work so I will be able to supervise any moving activity tonight.