SP, you sound frustrated and tired and we all get it. Your allowed to feel your feelings. This absolutely suxxx, no getting around it.

What can you do to release some of this energy? What plans and life goals do you have for YOU???

We are here for you, keep writing and getting those feelings off your chest. We don't mind.

You can not change your past, but you can ruin a perfectly good present by worrying about the future.