I know I shouldn't "pursue" him but I took a few risks in the last month:

5 May: Retrouvaille post session focused on sex. This is a major issue for us because we've been in a sexless marriage for a long time (i wanted to but it's physically painful due to memories of trauma with ex-BF). For some reason, we never talked about it. He must have felt so rejected. That night, I told him that I actually enjoyed the way he touched me and I didn't mean to reject him; I said that he can help me overcome my problem if we go to therapy together. He said "ok" (previously, he didn't want to go to MC). I asked "Let's try again?" but he said "Slowly…" (He still feels scared / does not want me to touch him.) Is this a small breakthrough? Should I not have brought it up at all???

A few days later, he contributed to our joint account again (after 2 months of not doing so).

End-May: We went on a 3-week trip -- most of it is a work trip for him but we planned extra days to sight-see. I was hesitant to go (wanted to give him "space") but he wanted me to join him. Much of the trip went well although he was distant. On days he was at work, I was happy to do things on my own (GAL). When he came back from meetings, he brought back things that he knew I'd like, eg desserts. We chat and laugh. However, when we were watching sunsets or at romantic restaurants, I sensed that he'd rather be with OW.

It's a struggle to show happiness and contentment when he's so standoffish… frown I need to detach more.