I think you may be correct. But i guess i will still ask and see what my coach says.
I can say i have had no contact for a little time and it does bother me a little. i mean i still miss W and the things I do like go out to lunch or see a pool now that i dont have one. i think of the times we had.
Looking for a house is one thing we did and im doing it alone and miss W input.
At the same time I am very angry at the new GF W has. The one that i think made W want to try the other side. Also angry that here i am now staying in a depressed house no pool no place to really call my own and no place to recharge myself. While she has a rental house with a nice pool and a GF and im sure just not think about me at all. All this and I am not the one that wanted it nor just gave up. So yes im angry and lonely and maybe jealous she is living it up and partly was on my dime but has since stopped that..
Is this normal thinking and is it ok to be a Godly person and be so ANGRY with someone??
I think you may be correct. But i guess i will still ask and see what my coach says.
Maybe you do this, but I find it helpful to take notes at therapy, I would suggest doing that with your coach.
Originally Posted By: lostforever
At the same time I am very angry at the new GF W has. The one that i think made W want to try the other side. Also angry that here i am now staying in a depressed house no pool no place to really call my own and no place to recharge myself. While she has a rental house with a nice pool and a GF and im sure just not think about me at all. All this and I am not the one that wanted it nor just gave up. So yes im angry and lonely and maybe jealous she is living it up and partly was on my dime but has since stopped that..
Mind reading and you really need to put your energy into thinking about you
Originally Posted By: lostforever
Is this normal thinking and is it ok to be a Godly person and be so ANGRY with someone??
I think all emotions are normal, esp during stressful times.
Is it OK to be angry since you believe in God? Well... Guess I am not the one to answer that, but if God didn't want you to experience emotions, I would think he may not have included them in the package...
What are you doing for you?
Do you have a list of GAL's?
M46,W41 D16,D18 M22,T25 BD 11/12 W moved out 01/13 Piecing 10/13 Divorced 01/15 "Whether you worry or not has no affect on the outcome. But, moving forward, letting go, and making changes can." UrWorthy
Well what I am doing at this time is not to much. I am working a lot because i can not be at home with my Dad.. I was out to lunch with the guys at work and they all told me i have a smell to me. this is from my dads house. so i just work come home go to bible study on tuesdays ride my motorcycle.
What i need to do is
walk to something physical I just cant push it. I need to start eating yup do not eat much at all. lost lots of weight. I want to go away even if it is by my self but just need to get away. I am house hunting looking to buy not rent. but feel as if i need to rent to get out. but if i rent i have to put out about what i would put down on a house and i will not see it back. I also need to get my place some place to call mine. i can not stay here long
well i got up today and have to work from home and I used to love doing that but hate it now. I just cant stay home any more. I need to be out.. But i have 2 things today 1st is a DB coaching session. and then a theropist session. I feel alot of anxity today and not sure why.
I do know that I just seem to no matter how hard i try to not think about my W i still do. Just so many question in my head and no answers. I have had NC as each person said including my Coach i talked to on monday. I think one thing is that i feel why does my W have it better than i do now. I know stupid and i should not care but it is in my head. also still even with the things i know and well have been told think is she really Gay... who knows. I do want to talk but at this point i have so many questions that i do nto know if i could just talk. i als think it may get out of hand. I mean that some time i think i have been stuffing alot of my anger for a long time and just am afraid of how i may react if things go wrong.
I pray that im doing the correct thing if there really is a corrct thing to do. I feel that whatever we do we do and we just have to deal with the outcome.
I know i dump a lot here but i thank you all for letting me. I know im not the only one feeling this way however i feel like i am.
Just so hard to not talk to W and get answers to my questions. also do i really have any chance or what it has been so long. so much anxiety over so much today. How do other deal with all this type of stuff.
OK well today i think was a mostly good day. It had its ups nad downs. but i feel ok.. Infact for some short times during the day i did not think of W. I am more in the mind set today that I will be ok and God will restore the marriage at some point. so do not worry about things today let him do his work in W. I need to work on me as everyone said. many many times. Not sure what changed but I do feel of. here comes the negative but i will say it anyway. I just dont want to ever think the marriage cant be saved at some point and i do not want to forget about her. but that is bad thinking i know. so Im ok today just praying for a better day tomorrow. Thank you God for letting me have a good day today. also thank you for all you here
I feel your pain.... I'm a personal mess over my situation. Friends who've walked this path say to give it time.... Go to your doctor and get a Xanax script...
OK well today i think was a mostly good day. It had its ups nad downs. but i feel ok.. Infact for some short times during the day i did not think of W. I am more in the mind set today that I will be ok and God will restore the marriage at some point. so do not worry about things today let him do his work in W. I need to work on me as everyone said. many many times. Not sure what changed but I do feel of. here comes the negative but i will say it anyway. I just dont want to ever think the marriage cant be saved at some point and i do not want to forget about her. but that is bad thinking i know. so Im ok today just praying for a better day tomorrow. Thank you God for letting me have a good day today. also thank you for all you here
Try to think about what is was that allowed some peace today. Were you doing something? Whatever it was, remember it and work on doing more of it.
This is going to be a very long journey and you will need to find ways to fill your mind with other things than your W, M and negative.
Take time to read other threads on here, if the stories are not helpful or depressing, just focus on the advice that is given in them. The advice you will find and get here is what can help you save yourself.
M46,W41 D16,D18 M22,T25 BD 11/12 W moved out 01/13 Piecing 10/13 Divorced 01/15 "Whether you worry or not has no affect on the outcome. But, moving forward, letting go, and making changes can." UrWorthy
JP787 well I was aat the dealer all day long getting my car serviced. but i was out and with people even if i never said anything to them. It seems like i have lots the desire to get out and do things even if i know it is good for me. I jsut feel im almost 50 and I should have friends but i kinda realy dont. I have a few but maybe i am comparing to what or how many my W has. she has so many and I made friends with some of them as well but have had to almost let them go most of them. At this point all i do since i move in with my dad is work as much as i can and come home get on computer and go to bed. when I had my place with a pool i had friends stop by and had more activity with W mom she loves me. as well has W brother and his kids. But now once again feel as one more chunk of friends left me being that i moved farther away and can have anyone over here it smells bad and not good for company.
