"And to end this post, W made an appt with IC...I hope the C is pro-marriage and W is mostly honest, and not just looking for what she wants to hear...time will tell. Not in my hands."
"Okay, that didn't sound right.... W took an action step, and told me rather pointedly. Implying she sees that she needs help working some things through...I am grateful. I am not going to judge this by past metrics. Beginner's mind. It is a new turn. There, that's better for who I want to be."
"So, I have this positive, but cautious, feeling in my gut...I could be wrong, and if so, that's okay too. Continuing to sit quietly, doing "me" the best I can, teamwork, etc. Aloof, yet available."
I love the way you word your thoughts, T^2. Aloof yet available indeed, that will be my goal this weekend, thanks
I knew exactly what you meant by hoping the C will be pro-marriage, and that your W will be honest. I started seeing a C in March, before switching to my DB coach. This C told me that she "does not believe in MLC" and just sees it as an excuse for bad behavior, and advised me to throw the bum out. I spent our first session educating her! She did some research and at our next sesssion, said she could not believe she was saying this, but she thought I was right, and should try to stand the best I can.
If your W saw someone like her, even if your W was completely honest with the C, the C would be advising that if W is not happy, she should divorce. A bandaid for pain, rather than an attempt to actually fix yourself and the R.
Carry on being aloof and available, my friend. And I bet a dozen of us on this forum will be striving to be like you today also. Thanks as always, for your help!!!
