wife hardends heart

[planet]

My wife's another reason for divorce is my mom and sis. She feels that they have 'wronged' her and she is unable to forgive them. In fact, she hates them. She doesn't want them to be near my 2 daughters even when we eventually divorce.
My wife was very anxious around my family back when we are dating. She always seek their approval and constantly needs my reassurance that they accepts her. Unfortunately, if i look back, my mom did not really 'welcome' her. I know my mom, she can be 'cold' on the outside but she means well.
It all started after we were married a year. Words my mom used does not bode well with my wife. It sounded 'cold' but i brushed it off because i felt it truly wasn't meant exclusively to my wife's ears. i.e, My pregnant wife insisted that i asked my mom if she would care for my eldest daughter after she was born while we worked but my mom just shot 'have you delivered yet?'. To me it was nothing but to my wife it hurts.
I never took care of her feelings nor defended her. I always thought it was nothing. She never mentioned anything to me at that time but brought it up during fights.
My mom did not prepare nourishing soup for my wife throughout her pregnancy which we asians believe it was good for both mother and child. My wife felt my mom did not care. Again, I did not do anything. I guess i should have been more thoughtful and step up to ask someone to prepare something for her.
This is just few issues my wife couldn't forgive and forget. I should have been more caring and thoughtful. I should have defended her more. She must have felt all alone.
Regrets.