I think back to the wonderful man my H was, and I miss him. A lot.
But then I think that there was always this unrest and unhappiness brewing inside him. I wonder what he would be like if he ever gets to a place that he is settled within himself?
So I would not only have to work on getting past everything he has done to hurt me/our family while he was the pod person, but also would have to see if the new him is even someone I want to be with.
If I'm honest, that is quite overwhelming.
Raine, Linda, Miz J... We could talk all day about the OW!
No matter what the scenario is, it amazes me that our broken men can find someone just as messed up as they are, who are willing to be in a R with a married man.
In my case, I do think they talk about me. It's not like he can lie to her about some things about me - "oh TVS is a big ugly tub o'lard who is mean and an awful mother and wife and not very well liked by anyone."
She knows who I am and the kind of person I am. And I think it bugs her a$$.
I have often read that the OW often does not have remorse or guilt for what they're doing, because they are fed lies about you that justify the A.
But I do wonder, because she was my friend, is there a part of her that has guilt?
Apparently not enough to stop what she's doing!
I think that in all the situations, they simply create their own fantasy world with their warped reality. And ultimately, it is up to them to wake themselves up from their dream.
I hope more than anything that my H will wake up and see what is right before his eyes. His wife and children have so much love for him
Miz J, I have to say you have advanced your level of awesomeness... ccing the OW on the e-mails? I laughed out loud at that!
Raine, I sometimes think of what our parents must be thinking. We are their children after all, and they don't like to see us hurting or mistreated, no matter how old we are. I may be able to forgive my H one day, but I'm not so sure about my parents, which is why I tell them nothing. I may love H unconditionally, but they love me unconditionally.
As far as yoga goes...
I am being serious when I say that it has been life changing for me.
I started doing it when S2 was about 6 months old. I was out of shape, stressed out, and tired. At least I'm not out of shape anymore lol!
It helps tremendously with the stress and emotional overload I face. I always feel so much better after I go.
I see many parallels between yoga and my life. There are things in yoga I never thought I would be able to do, and now 2 1/2 years later, I'm doing them. I'm stronger, more flexible, and have better balance than I thought possible.
But it has taken hard work on my part, and time, to get here. And I'm still not where I want to be, still have goals and challenges for myself.
Sound familiar????
Look up the yoga position "side crow". That is what I'm working on accomplishing now. I never, EVER would have thought that was possible for me.
But isn't that what we are all doing, learning to shatter our limits and learn our true potential?
This Viking princess is going to batten down the hatches because the next few weeks are going to be stormy - birthdays, anniversaries, adulterous beach trips-
I can do this
Bomb January 2012 - doesn't feel the same about me
~ "There is nothing love cannot face; there is no limit to its faith, hope, and endurance."
