Yesterday would have been our 24th wedding anniversary, but instead we have been divorced almost two and half years and x has been married to someone else for almost that long. It feels weird, just weird.
I am doing pretty good. I am no longer completely debt free as I built my dream house (nothing fancy just a small ranch, but totally mine and what I always wanted). If I am careful I should have the mortgage paid off by the time I retire.
My oldest son just finished his first year of college and my youngest will be a senior in high school next year.
I haven't dated at all really. A couple of people have insisted on setting me up, but neither have been people I had interest in (good thing cuz they didn't show any interest in me either).
I am over 50 and overweight, two things that most men my age are not looking for. But that's fine too, if the good Lord wants me to have a mate he will ensure that I meet that person.
I am active in my church and I have friends that I do things with. I travel a little, mainly a long weekend here and there. Once both of my boys are on their own I plan to travel more.
Not sure why I felt the desire to come here and update today. This is not the life I anticipated at this stage, but it's not bad and there is even a lot of it that is good.
Me 54 DS19 and DS17 Married 06/1989 Divorced 01/2011
I like how you are comfortable with yourself. It is good to see you moving on and announcing short term and long term plans and goals with some dreams mixed in.
This says more about your state of being than anything else ever will.
Look in the mirror and give yourself a smile. You are on your right path. A healthy path.
With the weight. If it is bothering you. Talk to your doctor and work out a long term plan here as well.
Take Care.
Flowers always make people better, happier, and more helpful; they are sunshine, food and medicine for the soul. unconditional love is awesome!
I am over 50 (has NOT been a problem in my dating life - and surprisingly, all but one of the men I have dated have been younger than me. The current one is 49, 8 years younger than me, and that seems to be just about the right spread).
I'm overweight (although not obese; BMI 28, I'd like to lose 20 lbs for sure). Again, surprisingly, the men I've dated have had nothing but good things to say about my figure.
I'm just saying - don't ASSume there's not men out there interested in you. You're smart, evolved (we all are after going through this process!) and debt-free except for your mortgage - you've got a lot going for you!
I'm jumping in with Ellie too, as someone who is 51 AND who could lose 20 lbs happily. Damn menopause thing!
And my current guy is 4 years younger and is quite happy with how I look.
Ditto what Ellie said. You've got it going on like Donkey Kong! There are so few women out there (hell, people period) who live a structured and debt free life. I'd say that's beyond attractive!
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
I will chime in here too. I am over 50 and overweight. I still managed to find "The Man of my Dreams" and we've now been together for 9 years. So don't give up. The right man will love you for who you are. That said - I am glad I made some positive changes to be the best "ME" that I could be. My man is 7 years younger!
Good for you for building that dream house and keeping the debt at bay. Now THAT is truly admirable.
Weight loss is not always easy or possible, especially when menopausal hormonal issues kick in. Don't make the ASSumption that an overweight person isn't dieting or exercising.
I follow a Paleo diet and go to the gym 3 x a week with my 26 year old son. In the last 8 months of doing this together, he's lost 40 lbs - I've lost none. (I AM buff though )
Plus, she didn't say she was unhappy. She said that most men aren't looking for over 50 and overweight. There are plenty of men who are fine accepting a woman as is, though. I've met them. And thank goodness they are out there.
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
If you're not happy with your weight, why don't you change it?
I'm not happy with it, and I am working to change it. I was actually going to boot camp three times a week and working really hard at exercising while at the same time gaining 50 pounds during my divorce. I was also eating everything in site due to stress probably (yikes imagine how much I would have gained if not for boot camp!)
These ladies are right weight does not come off as easily as it used to. But I will just keep working at it, because I am uncomfortable. Not because it might get me a man.
I am not unhappy with my life. I'm not someone who believes I need a man to "complete me" or whatever. Having someone to share life with might be nice, but it might also bring other challenges.
I know plenty of people who are heavier than me and older than me who have found love. I was not bemoaning the fact that I have not been dating, I was just stating that fact as part of my update here. Maybe what I should have said is statistically finding the love of your life after age 50 is less likely (and being overweight does not help any). If it happens I'll be open to it, if not that will be okay too.
Thanks for all the responses.
Me 54 DS19 and DS17 Married 06/1989 Divorced 01/2011
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