With a hat tip to Kaffe Diem I am posting a link to a message of Virginia, a member of Michele Weiner-Davis' team:
Why You Haven’t Seen Change in Your Marriage (and What You Can Do to Fix It)
by Michele Weiner-Davis
If you have reached an impasse in your marriage-saving efforts, you will want to read this because it will help you diagnose the reasons you might be stuck. Don’t despair, just make sure you read this!
So, why haven’t you seen change in your marriage yet? Let’s take a look at a few possible reasons.