BRNR, I agree w/WH, it's okay to feel the way that you do right now. Allow those feelings to wash over you and let them go. Today is a new day and you will need to find a way to pick yourself up and move forward.
As for your h being happy w/this ow...yes, he is right now because it is a brand new, shiny relatiionship and it will tarnish soon enough when they are together full time. I don't buy for one minute that you've been replaced. No one can replace you. You are a wonderful and unique individual who has a loving and caring personality. Don't beat yourself up over what you should have or could have done differently. For one thing, if your h should have been talking to you over the years about how he felt and what he "thought" was missing from the marriage. I'm sure that had he spoken to you, you would have done everything in your power to change the situation...so stop beating yourself up! You are not a mind reader...none of us where. Every marriage has its ups and downs and the two people have to work together to make it work. He chose not too...you are still trying to salvage it. What does that say? Your h is a weak individual who has something missing within himself and until he fix that hole where empathy once was and accept his life as it is, nothing will change. He's running from himself, not you or the family.
You've had some serious talks w/your children. I wouldn't have any more discussions w/them about the matter for a while. If they come to you to talk, then fine...but don't raise the subject w/them again. Your one son has already said he's tired of discussing it. They are kids and they want to think about fun things and are looking forward to summer. What is going on between you and your h is very heavy and deep for them and they are trying to find a ray of sunshine to focus on. Come here to vent or talk.
I do hope today is a better day for you. You are a very strong woman and can get through this. Please don't allow his behavior to dictate how you look at life. Live your life for you and as if he's never coming back. Allow him to twirl in the wind all by himself. You are the prize and do not think otherwise.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
