Turtle, I can feel your pain. The situation with H s*cks. Yet you know, we know that you can not control him. You must give H as much time and space as he needs, which may be many more months or even years. At the same time there is no guaranteed success. In my estimate, after a year of mainly lurking, the "success" rate is about 10% in our forum - if you define "success" as reconciliation/piecing going on. You have to aim for a different kind of success: be content with yourself and your kids, no matter whether H or another man is at your side or not. Yes, this is painful, it is not what you wanted for your life but it is the challenge which life is offering to you now - and which you can master. Your party is the best proof that you can make it on your own.
