It seems it's not uncommon to go through several attorneys during a long D. One gets things started, but another may be necessary to finish it up.
When I consider how close we have been so many times to a settlement I'm starting to wonder why it just didn't get done. We have gotten to the point of small details and then it falls apart again.
The attorney I consulted today asked me which if either of the attorneys has been responsible for dragging this out. I told her I honestly didn't know. I haven't been part of the conversations. It does seem H's attorney is willing to put forth and retract different offers as H directs. That doesn't seem in the spirit of finalizing an agreement. But mine may have been just as much of a problem. She was difficult for me to deal with, but I don't know if she was holding things up.
This is a scary place to be in, but I know I just need to face the fear and continue taking action.
I just want security for me and the boys. I don't get why H would get in the way of that. I would think he would want the boys to have a secure life. If he truly wants to reconnect with them then stabilizing their lives has to come first. He's so fixated on his belief that I'm the reason they are rejecting him that he isn't considering other reasons, mainly his behavior. If he would have listened to their words and validated how they feel that would have gone a long way toward reconnecting.
Gosh, H could have come to me a year ago and said "The boys really want to stay in their home. Is that doable for you? What do you need to make that happen? If it's something I can do, I will. Let's work together to give them the very best we can." I know, that's a fantasy. Our entire marriage could have been different with a goodwill approach on important issues.
