Could i ask you what canged your mind and how long after did you two start patching things together? If i am reading your post correctly anyway.
It took about 2 years. However, I didn't trust my H to stay and he kept proving that over and over. I am not saying it was his fault alone, but I did keep ending up back at the starting point because when something would happen that he didn't like, he would say he wanted a divorce and we would spend 2,3, 4 weeks "split up". (In the same house, no physical contact, no communication other than children)
We finally started making progress and then, one night, I was out at the bar where it all happened, after a wedding, too much to drink. Texted H and asked him to pick me up, went outside to wait, saw OM, he asked me how things were going and I said "Great, I am really happy" and I gave him a hug...just as H pulled into the parking lot. I guess the universe has a sense of humor.
That was last June. We were on/off since then until this Feb when he said he wanted a divorce. This time was different and I knew he meant it. That is when I found DB. We are talking about staying together but he still doesn't "feel he can ever feel deep love for me again".
Be patient. I know it s*cks, esp since it appears you will get a D, but there are stories on here of people who R after D. IMHO, I do not think she would say there was a chance if she really didn't mean it.
M 46 H 44 D 12 S 8 M 9 T 11 BD 2/15/13 "Makes sense to stay together" 5/12/13 Agree we are 'healing' 7/13 Definitely Piecing 9/13
