"Now to fix the situation, it requires YOU to change."
Cemar, I have to say that when you constantly state that the only solution is for the LD partner to become as passionate about sex as the HD partner, I feel you are doomed to failure. It ain't gonna happen. Is there any room for compromise here?
Have you read what Dr. Harley has to say about the SSM over in marriagebuilders.com? There is an interesting article in the Q&A column called "Changing a Willingness to Make Love into a Desire to Make Love". In it he advises a LD wife how to get in the mood for ML. Some practical steps that require both partners to make some changes.
But I will admit that without your wife's recognition that there is a real, marriage-threatening problem, and a willingness to address it, you can't take these steps. So I will ask you again, How clearly have you stated the problem to your W? DOes she see the problem as clearly as you have explained it here? I speak as one who only understood the problem once divorce was in the works. I only understand now that my X was deathly AFRAID to make it clear to me, at the point when he still loved me, because to bring it up meant bringing up the question of whether I really loved him. Which I did but I wasn't showing him in a way that he could believe.
