But a WAW does not seem to have the drive to save the M, where the LBS does.
I will get back to Swede in a minute, but wanted to inject this while it was fresh on the brain. As a WAW myself, I felt that I had worked very hard over the years to improve my M. In fact, I often felt I was the only one who was. I would always be the one to start a R talk (or talk about anything of any depth much), and I would try to tell my H what was lacking in the M and what I needed. But after so many years of not seeing any changes from him, I just started giving up (in a sense). I was depressed and lonely. My energy for the MR was pretty much shot.
I believe it's the "timing" of the WAW and LBH that is so off. By the time she's done and ready to walk away from the M, he gets his wakeup call. Her interest & energy is tanked, while his just starts.
So, it's not that she was never interested in working on the M, but she was interested when you weren't. Now, you are interested while she's not.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!