"I Love you but love her too"....WHAT?

[Notlikingthis]

All and all it was a good 3 day weekend. Friday, H had an appt. at the dentist that took nearly all day. He was dazed and even more confused than usual when I picked him up. (They had him take a valium so he couldn't drive.) We were invited to a neighborhood BBQ and even though he should have been home resting he insisted on going. He was, as usual the life of the party and had a good time. The subject of board games came up and he suggested that we all get together some time in the near future which is normal behavior for him!

Saturday he invited me to go out to breakfast. Again, a good time, good non R conversation about kids etc. He wanted to go shopping for some things for a BBQ for that night so we stopped and picked up massive amounts of food. I saw glimmers of the old H all day long...happy, very talkative and pleasant as can be. Do you suppose it was the after effects of the valium. If so, I need a years supply of it! LOL He went about the day ordering things online for the house, talking about future plans for years into the future. We BBQ'd watched movies and he was more calm than I've seen him in a very long time. He always falls asleep with his hand on me but that night when I got into bed he pulled me closer and had even turned on some relaxing music. I kept my hands to myself and for the most part my back to him. I wasn't totally ignoring him but just a bit less warm than usual.

Sunday was a blustery day so we spent most of the day inside. He showed some signs of distancing and left the house to "get some air". A little bit later he asked me if I minded if he took one of the beds when he moved. It took every ounce of strength that I had to answer without emotion. I told him that he could take the one in the middle bedroom upstairs (the oldest bed that we own, of course) and he seemed surprised that I didn't tell him NO and even thanked me. I've wanted to use that room for a different purpose so it works for me and I don't even have to have someone come and take it away! He pushed a little further and asked if he could take one of the newer ones (give him an inch and he always takes a mile) and I calmly said no. He asked to take a specific blanket, the one that happens to be on our bed and I told him that he could. Poor guy, couldn't deny him his favorite blankie. He asked if I was sure....that he was worried that I'd get cold. In a joking tone I told him that I would be fine and would find another one and then told him teasingly that I was "resourceful". He laughed but he had thoughtful, worried look in his eye that told me he was thinking that I would replace the blanket with someone else. He said nothing for a very long time.

Yesterday morning he asked me if I wanted to go out and get a coffee. I declined so he went alone. When he came back he had this horrified look on his face and told me he had run into his sister and brother-in-law at the coffee shop. The odd thing is that they live at least an hour and a boat ride away. For them to run into each other in "our town" was very strange. The more he talked about it the more I could see how it effected him. His sister is one of his major issues from the past. He wouldn't let it go, saying that he felt like they were invading our space etc. He even mentioned it again last night as we were having dinner. This is good, he needs to work through that issue and seemed to be trying.

He went to bed early last night but at one point I heard him talking to someone. I'm pretty sure it was the ow. When I finally came to bed he woke up and started talking and cuddling. The first thing out of his mouth was that "he knew that this was all going to work out". I won't guess what he meant since, as Snodderly says, if their lips are moving, they are lying. He rambled about many things including running into his sister (he couldn't remember that it was just earlier in the day that he'd talked to her), held on tight until he finally fell asleep and left me laying there wondering what he has in store for me next. I expect nothing and hope for everything....someday, way off in the future. He's not ripe yet! LOL