Affair forecast:stormy with a chance of a break-up

[RosaLinda]

Sometimes, when they hit a milestone age like 40 or 50, they start to question stuff. They realize that they are responsible for a family, a career, etc. And they think that they will not ever have total freedom again. They are getting older and their mortality is hitting them. 

Now, for healthy men, those ages give them pause but they are able to handle it appropriately. But for those who have issues from childhood or issues not properly dealt with, they go into crisis.

TVS, I listened to a speaker once who claimed that teenagers need to fall in love and have their hearts broken a couple of times to form a strong, secure sexual identity. The speaker claimed that the best predictor of whether someone would have affairs in later life is whether he or she had 2 or 3 relationships between the years of 14 and 20. 

People say a lot of screwy stuff on the radio and this sure does not seem to pertain to your H. But it does to mine. 

He only had one girlfriend before me, and they broke up at 19 when she told him she realized she's a lesbian. That always bothers him. And his first sexual experience was with the girlfriend's young step mother, who seduced him when he was around 15. No wonder he's such a mess. 

 As far as the ow, the general length of these affairs are commonly between 18 and 24 months. Of course, that is a broad generality. 

How long it lasts has a lot of variables. 
The idea is for you to outlast it. 
And for him to figure himself out. 

You say your H's "bandaid" has been clinging for 18 months. That's a long time to wait patiently. My H's first EA lasted 24 months, but was not too hard to wait out because she was in Russia and he treated me pretty normally, with physical affection including sex. This new EA started last July, with 2 weeks of PA in March. No physical contact for me this time, and it's hard. 

So maybe you have up to another 6 months to endure, and me, up to another year. 

I think I can bear it that long. I'm not sure. It hurts and I'm weary. But you're a lot stronger, you should handle it fine. Then there will just be that hurdle of learning to trust again......