First, I have to say I am irked. My use of capitol instead of capital will remain in these archives for a very long time. *sigh*
~~~~~~~~~~~ overview
Yes, it is very clear your H is in work only mode. He has a few motivations. Some are probably unconscious for him. Tucked in there is quite likely to escape.
I do understand that it is confusing for you as the original pretext was for the two of you to use the business as a way to remain together and now he is now using it to escape. For you, the environment and context is familiar, yet (some of) his behaviour has changed. It likely would have been less confusing for you had he simply abandoned the business.
Further, it's confusing because he not only seems to want his space, he also dropped the bomb on you, yet he is working hard to take care of your needs. And it's probably been equally confusing for him as he thinks he wants to end things, yet feels obligated to you and your well being.
I do understand that I'm stating the obvious, I'm just putting it out there again because there's very clear cues, here. I know it's been stated before, so this is a reminder.
+ He wants space - he's burying himself in his work
+ He is confused - he thinks he wants to leave the R (BD) yet he wants to take care of you and your future needs (car, house, clearing debt and wages)
Now I think that confusion is compounded because I get a feeling that he thinks that he's providing you with a car and a house (if you chose to take those offers) when in reality all he's likely doing is paying off debt and wages, I don't think he'd ADD the house and the car if debt and wages were paid off.
~~~~~~~~~~~ business part
Which leads me to what I was saying about the possible problem if he paid off your debt and wages before drawing on the business for himself.
IF he were to do that and you were to accept, then depending on articles of incorporation (or lack thereof) or lack of formal business partnership documentation, he could possibly move forward with the business as sole owner. I am not a L and there's not enough information for me to guess whether he'd have a successful case. I'm just saying that could be a possibility. With your debt paid and his still on the books, you have little leverage to claim business partner rather than short term debtor and employee.
If YOU draw, HE should draw an equal amount. Otherwise, I would suggest that you draw wages and he also gets paid out wages, the loan capitol of both of you stays until it can be paid out equally, in full if need be.
Unless... you are willing to let go the business.
~~~~~~~~~~~~ personal part
Right now, there is nothing. If you two did not work together or own the business together, it is possible that he would bury himself in his work and you would not see or hear from him until slow down.
In that case, all you could do as far as DBing is work on yourself and wait for as long as you could and hopefully become an even more amazing woman that only a fool would leave. And also hope that he "woke up" if this is MLC.
So all you have right now is a promise from ~7 years ago, to enter into a business partnership with an estranged partner, in the hopes that business partnership would help solidify a more committed personal relationship and potentially M.
You are still working under that premise... him... not so much...
So here is where it really ends, ball in your court, your choices:
+ stay in the business under the same context as you entered into it, remaining frustrated because what was working before BD is no longer working now, because he changed the game, for some unknown reason, which could potentially be MLC.
+ leave the business. Take your spoils and move on from the business and start a new career and wait things out. Work on yourself and hope that he will eventually notice the positive changes in you, his MLC begins to fade, or business slows down and he has had time to re-think what he wants and decides that he wants you
+ leave the business and give up all hope, move on with your life and work on yourself and create a new future for yourself, what ever may come
+ stay in the business, focus 100% on the business and let go of the R. Work on yourself, become an even more amazing woman that only a fool would leave, and maybe once things slow down at work, he might decide to re-engage in the R.
IDK... what do you think you would choose? At least for now. You can always change your mind at a later date.
