Any thoughts as to how to tell her to move? I thought about telling her the truth which is that this is too painful for me, and that it gives our daughter the,message that this is acceptable behavior. And its not! Mommies and daddies dont sleep in separate rooms and dont gave boyfriends either.
Then tell her! It is time to stop with all the different programs, techniques, various books and different forms and the M advice given. You have been told that the advice from MB often collides with advice in DB. You have bounced around so much that you must look to her like you've lost your mind! And now you've decided to compete with OM?
I don't think you should be trying to have fun with your WW. I think you should tell her you will no longer finance her affair. I think you should tell her that you will no longer take her calls when she is with OM.......and neither will she be speaking to her child she left to go screw her AP.
I think you should see a lawyer to see about your chances of child custody and other legal advice. If you are serious about ending this, you won't mince words. You lay it out to her in a very firm stance, IMO. Tell her you've lost respect and trust in her. Don't tell her how much it has hurt you. Tell her she ends the A right now or to pack her bags and to leave her child the same place she leaves her when she goes to OM. Tell her you want a better role model for for your little girl.
Of course, that's not what your DB coach would advise. Like I said, you have to decide who to listen to and stick with them, instead of jumping back and forth. And in your case, you don't need to take some advice you've read on another thread or forum and decide to try it out to see how it works for you. Things have gone on too long with all of that to have much influence.
But if you tell her to leave, you better be strong enough to back it up. What if she refuses? What then? Better have it thought out. Don't "use" it as a gimmic, hoping she will fall into your arms begging for forgiveness. That seldom happens.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
