Some small signs and settling down for a marathon

[Papa4Life]

Hi Rky, happy belated birthday and hope you're feeling better. Physically, that is, but emotionally I hope you're coping with this latest development.

First off, I want to commend you for your restraint in not going ballistic and venting your anger to your W about your latest discovery. Losing your temper never helps, so keeping your cool was a major victory for you.

I don't know about anyone else, but I would confront your W about your suspicions. You're well within your rights, IMO, to let her know there's only room in your R for two and that you won't work on your R as long as she pursues an R with another person.

I would also set boundaries, saying you don't want the kids exposed to the OM and that you won't pick up the slack for her if she wants to make time with somebody else.

Other than that, I'm afraid it'll probably just have to play itself out. I hope your concerns turn out to be unfounded. In the meantime, try to stay positive and focus on your own needs. We're here for you if you need us.