Thank you so much for taking the time to reply to my post.
I posted some of this earlier but, I am still under MOD control, they dont post right away.
How do I get off MOD?
I am so new at this that I dont know what is proper to do and what is not. I have read DB and DR and the 37 rules and so much more. I just need help with applying them to my situation.
I posted a reply earlier today stating that I have given her all of this years paystubs. I was not keeping the money away from her, just the paystubs. I see that this was wrong. She has never asked me to see them or the past 5 years. It just seemed so out of the ordinary that it made me nervous.
I see now that you are correct with respect to witholding the paystubs. Mind you, I am still learning. So thank you for pointing out what I am doing wrong.
I talked it over with my MC and he said the same thing- to build trust, dont withhold that kind of info from her. So I will not. I was just scared that it would be a mistake to give them to her in case she was seeking an attorney. I now realize that even if she has, its not my place to try to control the information and therefore control her.
I am trying to find that line between "my boundaries and being too controlling". Like I said, I am only about 2 months into learning how to manage this. So thank you all so much for all your help. Keep it coming please.
