I will start with saying, I do remember a prior time when the two of you were scheduled to go on your "saturday shopping". I do remember myself and possibly others, suggesting that you go along in order to make it a "good" time. Those are the "social" business times and they are actually beneficial and in your case, potentially valuable for working on your R.
That said, that was good, and right now... it may not be working. Part of DBing is doing what works... another part of DBing is to stop doing what ISN'T working.
Now, your H has said some things that are a bit contradictory, unless there is some of your own interpretations of what he said, in your post:
+ He IS asking you to take on a more proactive, equal partner position and role
+ He IS asking the two of you to expand your catchment by him going shopping and you being available for clients
+ He (interestingly) has suggested you conduct your own due diligence and not always trust HIS judgement or decisions or spending...
I want to touch more on this last one, specifically. And I'm going to go out on a limb and submit that... it is possible... that he's telling you... HE doesn't necessarily trust his own judgement or decisions... or alternately, that he DOES TRUST YOUR judgement and decisions.
Which leads me to consider, that because he may not trust himself, that he is critical of himself. THAT behaviour can show up towards others, by him ALSO being critical of others. Expecting more of himself so he also expects more and better from others. But really points to his own, personal issues.
Also notice, he suggests that you do your own thing and learn from your own mistakes and successes. THAT... could actually be your cue to allow him the same.
