Ahh, Danial-san, you've sanded the floor and waxed-on, waxed-off so often, you're ready to take on the Cobra Kai! Sweep the leg!!! Sorry... Don't even know if you're old enough to get that refernce. Let's see...[scroll, scroll]. Aha! 39z you get it
But seriously (inevitably that phrase seems to make it into every one of my posts) you're use of the DBing 'crane technique' and it's resulting positive outcome goes back to Men are from Mars, women are from venus. Guys are wired to be problem solvers, so if a woman says to us, hey, that was rotten what you did, we tend to say something like, well, next time do this and it won't happen again.
But as most of us LBHs are now learning, she's not saying solve my problem for me. What they are really saying is, hey you hurt my feelings when you did that. So, by listening calmly and validating her feelings, you help her feel acknowledged and emotionally valued. And all it takes is a few minutes of STHU! Who knew?
M41 W42 M 12 T 15 S10, D9, twin Ds 3 1/2 BD 1/2/2013 Living as roommates Working on D agreement w. mediator 5/13
