My feelings of being done are basic self protection. Because H may say he's 'not closed' but his actions are nothing different than the past year. He's going through the motions, but he did that throughout our marriage. This is probably part of 'believe nothing they say & only 50% of what they do'. Worse yet, when we are alone and having what seems to be a pleasant time, it feels like it did for the past 2-4 years of our marriage. Nice, pleasant, I used to think loving - but with dead eyes and obligation on his part instead of being engaged.
So from a db point of view, do I continue to fight the basic survival mode and continue believing in miracles & self improvement?
Or I can even look at ^^ and say to myself that I don't know what he is really feeling, I'm not giving him a chance, I'm being judgmental, I can only control myself, I need to be patient and just work on myself... all the things I've learned through this. But it's in direct contrast to my gut, which is telling me I tried but it's over.
And it's much better to express this not in anger.
