Not sure how to lay down the law. If I tell her that something is unacceptable I get this response text book
"nobody is asking you to stay here"
The only law I could see is ultimatum or make her start owning that she is unwilling to work on the M.
I mean it is obvious I need to detach from the behavior as much as possible. The fear I have is this snowballing into months. Which I know I have choices. I could leave the home. (I don't want to do this, I love my home and worked my azz off for it)
I could ask her to leave.
I know my only 2 choices are really detach or divorce. It is that simple. I get it.
I made a call into a counselor today that strictly focuses on ACOA. I'm hoping we can work something out.
B how do you suggest laying the law without oversimplying stating lay the law. My sitch is odd. I have conflict avoident W and I become conflict avoiding out of fear. We are both ACOA. We both go to the reactive brain when communicating. On top of things based on some EE support I am pretty sure she has a mood disorder that I don't ever see her addressing. She also knows my love languages and does not speak to them. Almost perfect storm of crap.
The whole thing is just craziness really. This is same W that was using s e x toys with me 1 1/2 months ago that she introduced and went to a tropical island with me. This whole thing is bat shi t crazy. As many describe roller coaster that I am not liking
