Is this MLC or WAS? Don't know what to do...

[BrightFuture]

Portia, yes, it is difficult. I’m also surprised at how long I’ve been experiencing all these feelings. I thought I was strong… I came to this country from a completely different world. I had to start over with my carrier when I was almost 30. I had to take care of my son, I had no other relatives, except my H’s brother and his family, but they had their own lives and I could not rely on them for any help. I earned my second Masters here while working full time, keeping the household, driving my son to his sports and other activities. My H was traveling for work quite often, so I was pretty much a single Mom a lot of the times. I achieved what I wanted in my professional life. Because of this we were able to afford to live in the nice house and the city my H always wanted to live, we were able to afford a vacation home, which he now wants for himself (he is leaving me the house, which is has more value though.) Sometimes I feel that he was just using me. I know it is not true, he is not that kind of person. But, I cannot get rid of this feeling recently.

My friends were very supportive of me through all these months, but I think they are running short of patience. They don’t want me to be hurt. Interesting part is that this GF who left me a message about moving on is actually divorced. So, she went through this herself, except it was her who initiated the D. But, I remember her calling me and crying for a number of years before she finally got D’d. Her H was emotionally abusive and a complete j@rk. I think she forgot how many times I and my other GF told her to get out of that M, but she still had some hopes that it could change. I remember listening her crying on the phone and thinking “here we go again”, but I also remember that I was not pushing her too hard, I was trying to listen. She did what she thought was right for her and at the time that was right for her. Now, the situation is reversed, and I want the same kind of understanding. Even if I go for D right now, it will not change my feelings for while, I will still have bad days and cry.