PM: 4k - Yes I thought the same. Your right about why does she get to spend the 4k, that was my point with her about it. Although I am not sure what a normal retainer should be because when I first consulted with a lawyer I forgot to ask stupidly. I will call today and get some specifics.

Honestly I am avoiding bringing these things up and waiting for her to initiate these conversations. However she wants to also meet with a MC/Family Therapist (LMFT) to talk through how to deal with kids. I found a great one that was recommended but its a bit far (40 min away), not that distance should matter, and the MC said she is pro-marriage but also doesnt sugar coat things. Its important for me to figure out the best way for us to handle telling the kids and everything else, but I worry it may be risky if MC decides to probe the root cause of the split. Alhtough I would be ok, I dont think she may want to, so its concerning how to handle. I dont want to pressure this chance for us to talk with someone that is objective.

M: 43
W: 43
Married: 17 Together: 20
BD: 4/8/13 no legal or physical S as of yet
3 kids: S:14 D:13 D:9
W admitted EA: 5/5/13
Mediation started: 6/3/13
W says EA is done: 6/30/13 - still interested in D