Suckerpunch down to the wire

[25yearsmlc]

You're not going to like this so take a big breath and then let it go...
I know what is fair, but I also know what I am able to do financially without hindering my own future.
D Court addresses the finances of both parties and will try to strike a balance from what's in the marital pot. Whether or not that hurts your future won't be a factor. Whether of not it hurts your W's future won't be a factor. It's not about the future, it's about the right now.

What's she's asking for now and what she'll actually get may be 2 very different things. You're stressing about things that haven't happened yet, this is a pattern with you.

One more little thing, which if you can control might make a huge difference in your outlook. There is a hint ofmy W wants out of the marriage so everything she did during the marriage is now worthless and I should get whatever I want. Before you jump into defensive mode, just think about this for 24-48 hours. I think we all start out there, there's no shame in it, it's just not the truth.

I doubt that your W woke up one day and thought, "Today begins my plan to screw-over SP!" This has been difficult for her, too. She loves your daughter and knows that life as she's known it is about to change in a very big way. For whatever reason this is the choice your wife felt she had to make. But that doesn't negate the fact that the 2 of you were equal partners for several years. If you now feel that you weren't, this isn't the time to address that.

I know her decision is causing you hurt.

Try not to be one of those hurting people who hurts other people. It's a vicious cycle.

WHAT SHE SAID...^^^^^ please listen to us. You cause yourself MORE pain by ignoring us.

what YOU think is fair and what YOU THINK you can afford are not the same. And not relevant in court.
Plus, no one "benefits" from this. You really believe she'll be skipping away happy and "rich"? And stop devaluing all she did b/c she left you. I swear you really do have selective memory.

She won't be "living the life" if she gets $40k, AND half of the assets, b/c based on YOUR view, it's so little, she'll have nothing within 18 months at most,

and with what type of income?? You're better off either way, financially, than she is.

So if it's "winning" that you want, then congratulate yourself.