This past weekend I was away visiting family. Sat was the first day since BD that I felt pretty close to normal. It was nice. I haven't been too bad since. I don't expect it to permanently stay, but it was nice to feel that way again.
Me:38, Wife:36 M:8 T:13 No kids Bomb:3/10/13 W moved out:3/30/13 Started D paperwork: 10/14/13 D final: 12/30/13 To a future of love and happiness...
W: Did you have a good visit with your family? We went to a few antique stores, but other than that, it was pretty boring.
M: Yeah, my visit was good. Sat my dad and I went to Krista’s house and helped them do some work. They’re basically re-doing everything so when it’s done it’ll be almost like a new house. Krista’s pretty excited. Sat night my mom and I grilled out and Sun I hung out with everyone at my mom’s. Krista let me borrow her digital piano. I’m going to attempt to learn to play. It’s something I’ve wanted to do for a while. I’m a little worried that I’m too old to learn a new instrument though .
W: Glad you had a good time. No, you’re not too old to learn! You’ll pick it up quickly, I’m sure.
M: Did you get the 2nd monitor working?
W: Yeah, I think I’m through with it now. I just had to move over some windows that were trying to pop up on the wrong monitor. I’ll bring it back over soon. I ran across your class ring too. I still haven’t made a dent in putting things away. I did buy a plastic shelving unit last night to stick out in the “shed”. That will help a little.
M: I’m sure that once you’re done with organizing everything your apartment will look great.
W: I hope so. I’m still not used to it.
M: I can understand that.
This is pretty standard conversation for us. I want to portray that I'm doing just fine but sometimes I'm afraid to come off as gloating. Should I be perfectly honest if I had a great time doing something or should I keep it to myself a bit?
It was actually nice to hear that she's still not used to her apartment. It's nice because I'm still not used to coming home to an empty house!
Me:38, Wife:36 M:8 T:13 No kids Bomb:3/10/13 W moved out:3/30/13 Started D paperwork: 10/14/13 D final: 12/30/13 To a future of love and happiness...
I think being honest is your best bet. I think you can tell her you had a good time without sounding like you are gloating. I think you did that in your messages.
It has to be hard coming home to an empty house. As you know, I am facing that in about 3 weeks. Any advice on how to not let that totally just beat you down?
Also it is good that you can still message her and be cordial. I am afraid that I am going to have trouble with that. I think that when she leaves I will not want to speak to or message her. Maybe that feeling will change.
M 37 W 36 T22 M14 D8 D4 8/2012 distanced BD 11/2012 (likely wants D. Feelings have changed.) W move out date: June 8th.
I tell you it is hard coming home to an empty house without the W around. My sitch I had xmas holidays to come home to a new tenant moved in with me, due to Education housing. No longer a family house but now shared housing. Haven't had shared accomadation in over 25 years. Also my youngest moved out the same time as the W and went back home to the city. So within a few weeks of the BD, I lost the W, son and had a new person (that I didn't know) move in. All I can say is while it is hard to do, it can be done. It also means it is no easy feat if the W ever decides to come back to me (not that it is expected) as I cannot force the other tenant to move out now.
ME:51 W:46 M:25 S:22, S:20 Divorced 16/9/15 BD 10/12 W left 12/12 with OW, affair confirmed Nov/12. Dark since 6/13 I"m in a new relationship since Feb 14.
It has to be hard coming home to an empty house. As you know, I am facing that in about 3 weeks. Any advice on how to not let that totally just beat you down?
I did a little rearranging, put away of any photos of her or us together, and set things up the way I wanted them. It was still very hard at first but it's getting a little easier. Keeping busy with things helps, as does getting out and not being home all the time.
Me:38, Wife:36 M:8 T:13 No kids Bomb:3/10/13 W moved out:3/30/13 Started D paperwork: 10/14/13 D final: 12/30/13 To a future of love and happiness...
Not easy being in an empty house. I did the same as JRG in stages. Started taking down pictures, re arranged furniture, bedroom, moved her dresser, etc out and am going to paint the house starting this week.
Shew, we have so many pictures in our house. That will be tough to do. Do you just put them in a box? Do you have a bonfire?
make sure you think that through, taking down photos and rearranging. I say that since you have children.
M46,W41 D16,D18 M22,T25 BD 11/12 W moved out 01/13 Piecing 10/13 Divorced 01/15 "Whether you worry or not has no affect on the outcome. But, moving forward, letting go, and making changes can." UrWorthy
.