Hit hard still taking another step forward.

[T1000]

The logical part of me understands her not wanting to completely severe the connection with OM. After all if I don't work out why wouldn't she look into a possible future with him.
Something I don't understand. If she has dumped him and he is telling her he loves her, sending her flowers and trying to converse with her. What does staying at the gym achieve? I can't see that by itself keeping him in a holding pattern.
(How the hell do I compete with Mr Bouquet with no pursuing?)

She likes the gym, it's near and it's cheap.

Am I wanting to lay down this rule because I can or because I need to? I'm not sure.
It's annoying but I don't feel threatened by it. I would rather he fell off the edge of a cliff somewhere but that's not going to happen.

I think if she was 100% lets rebuild the relationship and be married again then I think it is something I should pursue for some piece of mind. Am I being controlling? I feel like it's something I can put my foot down on and she would have to respect my need for it. Am I wrong in wanting to put her out because I feel put out?

Until we are at that stage I'm setting boundaries that I can't sufficiently support.
I say you can't go to the gym or I will what....?? Not be part of a relationship that isn't really there yet.

I only brought them up last week because I understood the situation differently.

When she said she wants our R to happen naturally, not be forced, not get into habits of staying over every Sunday night just because we can. 10 months ago I would have tried to reason with her, explain why it's makes sense to do it a certain way. I have come to the conclusion that no amazing explanation of why it would work is going to do any convincing. She has to feel it.
When she left in June, nothing would have convinced her that we could work again. After months of this and that by October she was trying to convince me to move to where she lived so we could carry on with our marriage.

It's easy to over look the changes already. In the last 2-3 weeks my sitch has changed loads.
In another 2-3 weeks it could be anywhere. Up or down. Aiming for up.

Next week should be interesting.