Is this MLC or WAS? Don't know what to do...

[RosaLinda]

Hi BrightFuture! I so appreciate your advice on my thread, and that you pointed out the similarities in our situations -- that our H's both are having EAs with women in foreign countries who are looking for sugar daddies, but our H's have absolutely no way to support these OW financially. I have read every word of your thread, and think you're doing great!

You wrote "He is not working, and probably will not have a job until April or May (his job is seasonal.) It seems that he is pretty happy where he is at the moment. That was his plan from the beginning – to have everything joint, no D for now, and just to be friends." I fear that is my H's plan too, to continue his EA while I work to support us, and just live as not-too-friendly friends. Did you legally separate your business from his yet?

I'm so glad for you that your H has not filed for divorce yet. I am the newest of newcomers and haven't even completed reading the whole Divorce Remedy book yet, but would advise you to put all thoughts of divorce far far out of your mind. Your H keeps saying that he wants one, but has made no moves towards obtaining one besides looking at one website. Maybe he never shall. Even if he does initiate a divorce action, it won't be the end of the world, and you two can still reconcile. Judging by my own H, MLC brings muddled, confused thinking. Just let him talk, and don't give up on your M yet!

Do you feel your DB coach is helping you? I went to see a mental health (not divorce) counselor, to try to become emotionally stronger and ready to face what ever comes in my M in the future. I was appalled when in our first session, she advised me to kick my H out of our home, and told me that she does not believe in MLC! I wasted much of our 50 minute session telling her about all of the literature supporting MLC. Maybe a DB coach would be more helpful to me.

Hang in there BF, you seem a bit down, but really are doing wonderfully!