Not confused...trying to keep hope alive!!!

[BRNR]

Thank you all for your comments

So you weren't Mary Poppins this time. Shake it off. Next time you want to defend yourself to the teeth against your Hs view of life ( do not blame you a bit) just maybe remind yourself that you do not want H discussing your R with the kids and neither should you. Your kids are old enough to understand what is going on. They see much more than you realize, you do not need to defend yourself to them. Just be there.

Portia, I think this is why I was beating myself up last night...because I do know this and have lived like this all along. Thanks for the reminder...I did dust myself off before I went to bed.

So in other news...H didn't make his deposit as he stated he was going to on Friday. I even waited until today to see if it would happen....but NO.

So I feel a little naive thinking H would take care of his financial obligations to me, the boys, and our debt. This Friday will be an entire month of seeing NO money from H and at this point he has made my decision easy to go file for support. Unfortunately even with the award of support, I will not be able to keep up with my side of financial obligations to our joint debt, but I will be able to pay for the house and all the expenses that come with, daily needs for the boys and I, and all of my sole credit lines.

Has this happened to any others on the board?...surely I cannot be the only one. How did others handle things? Has anyone been successful to reconcile under the surmounting financial problems like these?

I know the idea is to keep the road paved home smoothly, but things couldn't possibly be able to turn around from financial stress, which svcks because we had NO financial problems when H decided to leave.

So here goes my marriage...getting deeper into the dark hole. I wish I could see into the future...or at least the finish line. I feel as if I have no path anymore and I am stumbling along trying to find my way.