They are just crazy, and miserable, and always right, ...
Originally Posted By: wishing,hoping
My H is negative all the time too.
May I ask how long your H's have been this way?
Originally Posted By: kml
Ummm....your signature says you've been married for 21 years, so that would mean he's been this way for 20 out of 21 years of the marriage. I would assume that THIS is who he is, and he was just able to put on a pretty face for the first couple of years that you knew him.
It started with the birth of S20 and got progressively worse with each child.
But it used to be just towards me, and somewhat to S20.
For the last 10 years its grown toward the world at large. The "squish" game started about 8 years ago. Before bd, well before, like maybe 3 years ago, I told H I was worried about him because he had no "joy" in his life.
Before bd I just figured "Oh well, I married a jerk. Life happens, make the best of it, play with the cards you're dealt."
And then kaboom. So now I'm left in the post-bomb debris wondering what I would be "standing" for - ya know?
Because for me its not like it is for so many others here, who hope for a return to pre bomb life. There is actually very little difference between pre and post bomb here; some exceptions are now there is no affection - before it was initiated by me and I've of course stopped that, and now there's no sex. (Interesting sidebar here, H has stopped commenting on boobs. And he used to do that ad nauseum. H says too that he no longer has any interest in sex, never thinks about it.)
IDK, just musing about the beastie here I presume the status quo will continue for another 16 months or so - when the twins would leave for college (unless of course the IL's take a turn for the worse). And then? And then I don't know. Time will tell.
Off to get ready for the day! Looking forward to "life as a blond"
Me 46 H 56 M 22 yrs S22, D20, Twin Ss18
You teach people how to treat you by what you allow. What you stop. And what you reinforce. ~~~~~~~ A lack of boundaries invites a lack of respect.
I presume the status quo will continue for another 16 months or so - when the twins would leave for college (unless of course the IL's take a turn for the worse). And then? And then I don't know. Time will tell.
