Affair forecast:stormy with a chance of a break-up

[reachingHigher]

And guess who meandered on up to bed again last night?

I like this slowly reaching out to you.

I saw a pic on FB that I liked that reminded me of MLC.

It's a pic of several large tortoises facing the same direction and is entitled, "The Galapagos Olympics Hundred Yard Dash, Day Three."

Yup, it's slow but slow and steady wins the race, right?

[Takevowsserious]

Ha ha rH, I like the turtle cartoon. There's certainly nothing fast about MLC!
Slow and steady is the only way to go

I feel like he is reaching out too, just have to keep my expectations down. I think it helps that I act exactly the same in the morning whether he sleeps in bed or not. I don't ever bring it up or call attention to it. I don't want him to feel any pressure about it, only want him to come to bed if he wants to and feels safe doing so.

So....

H "asks" earlier in the week if he could go golfing after work on Friday, then out with the guys afterwards. I, of course, said no problem.

The last time he went with the golf guys to go see a band was when I heard the argument between he and OW. So who knows what the real story is.

Anyway, he calls me today at work to - in his words - update me about this evening. Said that even though it looked like rain, they were going to try and golf. That they were still going out afterwards too. Made a little small talk too, told me he liked a pic that my mom had emailed us of me and S5 from his birthday.

Here's the strange thing... He really didn't have to call me. We had already talked about the plans, and I knew I was picking the boys up after work.

Who knows.

My awesome parents are taking the boys for a few hours this evening. I'm actually not feeling well, am going to rest up a bit.

TGIF everybody!!!

[uRworthy]

Yep, get it on the organizing, TVS.

He's baking up nicely, I think.

But still has one hand on the life preserver. Cuz if he lets go too soon, watch out! LOL!

T, I think he called because he is getting uncomfortable and doesnt know why. Sorta like standing in a doorway with one foot in one room and the other in another room.

You play him exactly right.

I am sorry you are not feeling well, my friend.

Rest up.

[Takevowsserious]

Good morning all~

I don't know UW... Is he baking up nicely, or half - baked? Lol!

I like your analogy with the doorway. I get it.

I think where once he was so sure about his happiness with OW, now he's questioning some things. But, still not ready to do anything different. He's not strong enough yet.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Well, kids didn't get the memo... It's the weekend, you can sleep in!

H rolls in at 2:30 last night. He pulled car in the garage (usually parks in driveway and comes in front door when he comes in late), then actually comes upstairs to change.

I was half asleep. He turned on lamp, then took a shower. This is new!

I fell back asleep, and woke up with him standing over me by the bed. It startled me, made me jump lol! He rubs my arm, and said he just wanted to tell me that he was home. Said he was sorry he woke me, and that he jumped in shower because it was so smoky in bar and he felt gross. He then pulled covers up, tucked me in, gave my arm a final rub, then said good night and went downstairs.

???????????

A few hours later, he comes up to bed. Says he is very itchy again. He turns on lamp, and his back and arms are all red from him clawing at himself. He had me scratch his back, then turned off lamp and went to sleep.

???????????

As always, who knows what is going on in that brain. No doubt he has some guilt going on. Interesting how his behaviors have morphed a bit. Almost like replay behaviors without the teenager twist. (Parking in driveway, sneaking in front door, staying downstairs away from "mom").

Got my chair out for the show, have no idea what's going to happen next. Mimosas for everybody!!!

[job]

T,
How did he not think he would wake you up, i.e., turning on the light and taking a shower? Guess he wanted to make sure you knew he was home. LOL!

I still think the itchy sensation is guilt eating at him. If he gets this condition often, I wonder if he has attacks in the bar and other places as well.

He's half baked, but it slowly baking up nicely...time is what he needs. I know that there are days this journey gets you down, but you're a strong woman w/a lot of patience. He should one day get down on his knees and thank the good Lord that you've remained steady and been there for him. Not many would do so, especially w/him still living in the home. My hat's off to you.

I do hope you've got something fun planned today for you your children.

[reachingHigher]

Tvs, this is again another positive, tiny, reaching-toward-you-step.

How interesting! Is that the first time he has woken you in the middle of the night to tell you he was home? Maybe he thought you would be awake worrying 'bout where he was! Lol!

I can't wait to hear how he acts today!

Let us know...

[Raine]

Wow T I think he is trying. The touching on the arm...sweet and innocent and testing. Is he seeing if you'll pull away? I see a lot of positives in your post. Keep going awesome lady! You are doing great!

[uRworthy]

T, methinks there is a lot of stuff rattling around in his jello brain.

He's got one hand on the life preserver, one on you, one foot in one room, one in the other. No wonder he's so itchy.

Let's see, mamosas would be nice. Got my sunscreen, too. What are we eating, cuz this show is gonna be a doozy!

You got this, T. And we got you.

[Takevowsserious]

Hi guys!

Ha ha, yes, it's hard to believe he didn't mean to wake me up when he turns on a light, takes a shower, rubs my arm, and talks to me. He definitely wanted me to know he was home.

And I forgot to add that I didn't ask one stinking question about his night either.

Today has been busy - at mall now while S5 attends a birthday party for a classmate. I found red peep toe pumps for $9 - the shoe gods have definitely been smiling down on me lately!

H has been in a good mood today. Was napping in bed when I came home from grocery shopping this afternoon. This is very unusual, as he is typically on couch all the time.

Trying to gear myself up for tomorrow and the likelihood that he didn't get me anything for Mothers Day. He did last year, he always has. We have plans to go out to breakfast with all the grandparents.

I can just see it now... My mom will ask me what I got for Mothers Day, I will say nothing, and it could get awkward. We will see.

Thanks Snodderly, rH, Raine, and UW for this last round of responses
I say we set up a grill to do some grilling while the show goes on. Perhaps some Jell-O shots for dessert to go with the jello theme? Lol!

Thanks for having my back

[uRworthy]

Hey girl, no mindreading - lol!

Good for you for not asking any questions.

Have a response ready for your mom ~ like the good organizer you are. Or dont and refer her to your h.

Yes, grilling is good. Jello shots - even better.

Have a wonderful Mother's Day, my sweet friend.