WAW having affair, still living in separate rooms

[SFC_Swede]

Sure that wasnt me kenva

[JuneReN]

LOL! Swede...

You sound pretty good kenva. Keep strong, try to sleep, hug the babies.

I am in witness protection...swear H is reading my shtuff.... ((( ))) Inside Out

[newman7977]

I was real confident in my L meeting yesterday and felt real good when I walked out of there. I dont think w is going to like my lawyes response to her. If its a divorce she wants, then i have come to grips w it but she cant have her cake and eat it too. I noticed a guy waiting for the next appointment and he looked really bad. Could tell in his eyes. I felt for him. I thought I was doing good but later that night my emotions kicked in and could not sleep. S and I are going away for the weekend till sun morning so he can be w her on Mother's Day. I am trying to focus on s and I having fun this weekend and not thinking of what she is doing.

Hey kenva, you did good! Yes come to grip you can not control her decision. I'm glad you're seeing cake eating don't settle. Emotions are normal, feel it then channel it away. Have a great time with your son.

Keep journaling here and vent away here you got this!

Newman

[kenva]

So s and I had a great weekend. We hung out w friends and even w's sister and her friend for a while. On sun, w came to pick up s. my in laws were w her. I told in las not to invite me to dinner w them, so there is no pressure, and to throw her off , knowing she would be expecting them to ask me. W was evil cold. I could see the anger in her, because if in-laws interacting w me. We have a great relationship. She needs to know that even tho she wants to end m that it will not affect anything w me and her side of the family. W talked to a friend that day that I was hanging out w, and asked her about her s in-law who got a divorce and remarried. Asking if she likes the new husband. She said, not really but it's not what I like as long as she is happy. My wife responded to her, that's the way it should be. W is trying to justify and convince herself of what she is doing to our marriage is for the best. All about her.

[Positivespin]

Kenva,

Mothers day was a B#%%h for me. You are doing real well. Im impressed with the fact that you havent spoken about the OM yet.

When I think back I believe that my W was going out of her way to make me know she was having a affair so that she wouldnt have to tell me- must have been a little too uncomfortable for my W to admit to having a affair in a mature, civilized conversation.

At this stage they wont talk to you about anything substantial if its uncomfortable for them - because they are selfish and wouldnt want to subject themselves to that. I would assume filing for D and having you served falls under that catagory

LOVE your GAL activities- and keep building that R with your S. He is going to need you now more then ever. My D3 is asking me alot of questions regarding her mommy. If son isnt there with you yet- they will come. I recommend a good book about dads with sons and D or if you currently have a therapist ask what he/she recommends you say during this transition to co-parenting.

stay busy and continue taking care of you

[kenva]

W tells me yesterday morning that she and s are going to dinner. When they came home, s sais that was cool. She took him to dinner and a movie. The movie that he and I had planned on going to later this week. She knew it, but she got jealous of s and I this past weekend. Guess she is trying to compete.

[kenva]

Tonight I am going to give w heads up that she is going to be getting my response to divorce papers and that she won't be too happy about them. She is still cold, not even acknowledging that I am even in the room when she comes home. Yesterday she texted me saying she won't be at the house for dinner. She has always have said "home". ?. I still say bye or you guys have a good day when I leave in the morning, and occasionally she will say bye back.

[kenva]

I tell w that she will get a response on fri on the paper work. Her eyes lit up and said ok. Then I tell her that to give her heads up that she won't like the response and that we need to talk and work it out. Her facial expression changed and looked away nodding her head. Here we go now, more stress in sitting down and trying to come to an agreement, which won't go her way.

[SFC_Swede]

Kenva...I am in a similar boat. I just caught a glimpse of my soon to be presented D paperwork. She had it in her car that I was cleaning for her "girls weekend" trip this weekend.

I have been doing really good with DB, 180s, and LRT...and she has been...warmer, if thats not too strong a word. Meaning she hasnt been completely hostile. Now I see that was all a front.

I thought I was accepting of my fate...but that pit in my stomach is back.

Hang in there brother

[kenva]

W and s got home last night after his bedtime. She was cold and could see the anger she had in her. I guess she saw my response to divorce papers. I made a jokingly comment that it was a little past his bed time. Got nothing. I put son to bed and she had already gone into her room and had door shut. S tells me that they forgot backpack at day care fri. This morning I told s I would pick it up and take it to his school. W just laughed and I said what. She said he really doesn't need it. S said I do. Who forgets their kids school stuff so they aren't ready for Monday? Also she is the one who is strict on him being in bed at a certain time. I guess her rules aren't for her.