Yes...lot's of "aha's" here! I think you are dead-on for the most part.
The place we both used to live at---ok, I think I explained at one time that Wolfie and I have known each other for a long time--around 20 years. When we both lived in that town, we were next door neighbors and both married to other people. We were all such young-ones then, looking back in retrospect.
Maybe it represents the roots, the very beginnings of our relationship. Maybe it has to do with the innocence we all had back then.
Ahhh...and I just remembered the first parts of this dream. Wolfie and I were driving around in that area...and a couple was on a motorcycle on the road we were on. Wolfie had pulled out from a parking lot onto the road without looking...causing the couple on the motorcycle to swerve out into the road. I was looking back and seeing the couple spralled out on the road with cars and trucks going over the top of them, but not actually running over them.
I think that the couple on the motorcycle was us before the A--foolishly tearing trough our lives without looking at the warning signs that should have told us to take more care of the things that were (are) precious to us. Wolfie's carelessness (as the driver of both vehicle and motorctcle) caused life-threatening results.
I think that the apartment overlooking the water probably symbolizes us looking out over the panorama of our lives--the whole picture before and after we were a couple--taking it all in. The water was calm and the sun was coming down...so I guess that is symbolizing looking back now, as older people.
The kitten thing: yes, I had been thinking a long the same lines. I think it represents a the tender parts of myself that ware "mortally wounded" by Wolfie's infidelity. I think the kitten has to do with him (and the MC) wanting me to stuff down my feelings about the infidelity as a sacrifice to the betterment of the R.
I think my anger at the "insensitivity" was a clue that my wounds still need attending to, even though all of this connecting and renewal of passion is going on. I think the wounded kitten was about me being true to myself--attending to the healing that needs to be done in my OWN time, on my OWN terms, without being made to feel like I have to force it or rush it!
Now that I think about that kitten...it was kindof deformed and mutant-looking too...which probably indicated that the "places" I was wounded were unformed and already hurt way before this...back into my very early years. _________________________________________________________
Whenever I have not taken the anti-ds for any length of time, then take them again--the first thing I notice is that I start dreaming again. _________________________________________________________
Last night, I must have been having a nightmare. I woke up to realize that I'd been talking in my sleep...and crying. I must have woken Wolfie up--making a commotion, because he was holding me and rocking me in a comforting way. He kept saying, "I won't, I won't hurt you, I love you".
He said I had woken him up by crying out in my sleep...saying, "please, Wolfie, please don't hurt me". I guess that must have been the wounded kitten talking--and the anger is still there--because as soon as I was fully awake, I wanted to say (but didn't) that his "love" hadn't stopped him from hurting me before.
Geeeez...I HAVE to believe that it is possible to recover from this. This hurts like hell sometimes but the only way out is through. I HAVE to have faith that there is some peace and comfort on the other side.
I think you are RIGHT On with the final interpretation of the kitten in your dream, Tal...I'd forgotten that there was this "outside pressure" to ritualize the ending of the A and all...I think I posted earlier that such an idea makes ME very uncomfortable as well.
Indeed, others seem to want you to "put the injured part to sleep"...but your inner wisdom is telling you otherwise. It's revealing your unease, your disappointment, your legitimate feelings that you are just not "healed" enough for such a gesture, and others are not RESPECTING or paying ATTENTION to this.
Yes, anti-d's do supress REM sleep so expect a surge when you cut down. This can also lend intensity to the dreams themselves.
