Is this MLC or WAS? Don't know what to do...

[BrightFuture]

Thanks everyone for your support. I needed it today, and you all came to my rescue.

He packed some of this stuff. Still, there is a lot left, even clothes. I think I handled it well. I didn’t show any signs of distress, tried to smile, and even made a few jokes. We discussed some of the things regarding separating finances, etc. Almost nothing new compared to our previous conversation. He brought up the subject of D, but said that the website he was talking about last time is not reliable enough (from other people’s experiences), so he will look into finding another way to file the paperwork. He was not sure how he is going to do it, and said that right now he doesn’t really have time, since he will be leaving for work in another state next week (wow, he was not working for 5 months, so there was lots of time.) It seems that he is not in a big hurry about the official D. I told him go ahead and fill in the paper work any time when he is ready and send it me, and I will pass it to my lawyer. He asked me if I already have a lawyer and was really surprise that I mentioned it. I said that I interviewed a couple of lawyers. He was not happy about it. Like I mentioned before he wants to do the D without lawyers. I told him that we have some complications in our finances and there is some legal stuff that I don’t know about, this is why I want to retain a lawyer. He agreed, but then mentioned that we still have some time to figure it out.

He told me about the auto insurance he was trying to obtain, but it came to be more expensive than we are paying now. So, he thought that it is better to leave it as is for now. I should have told him that the rate we have now includes a significant discount for my professional degree, and he is going to lose it regardless of which insurance company he tries to transfer to. I guess, I will tell him this next time.

He also asked me to help him to pay for things and his part of the mortgage until August. That is when he thinks he is going to receive the payments for his job that he is supposed to start in a couple of weeks. I agreed. He’s been telling me about all the expenses he been having and the future once, so I have no reason to not trust him with the money right now.

I had a phone consultation with my DB coach yesterday. I asked him very specific questions about letting my H to use my mail address for some of his correspondence, or should I tell him No. My house is the only legal address that my H has in the US. When he goes to work, he moves from place to place and stays in his work camper or at the hotels. My coach asked me what qualities attracted my H to me when we met. I told him that one of those was that I was kind and tried to help people. So, he said that I need to show these qualities now and forget about the thoughts of letting my H to cake eat. So, I agreed for H to use the mailing address. He also asked me if he could park his car on my (our) drive way. I kind of expected he would ask, even though his brother leaves in the same neighborhood. So, I agreed to this too.

My girlfriend got on my case today for doing all of these things, she wants me to pack the rest of H’s stuff, put it in the garage and tell him to get lost. She says that he is using me. But, I thought of a different approach to this. By doing these “nice” things for H, I’m also making it harder for him to completely break away from me. So, in a sense, I’m also using him. Any opinions?