To me, they are sort of GAL b/c they are not about your w and you had fun and did not obsess.
But I'm one of those fans of GAL who believe in involving new people or people who don't know my sitch. And new hobbies or classes or the return to an old hobby or sport or activity that I have dropped but once loved.
That's why I ask about Joining a club/organization, volunteering somewhere needy and of interest to you, teaching--anyone anything, coaching, being on a team yourself, studying something new, and or doing something musical...all healthy activities that will introduce you to new people who DO NOT speak to you of your wife.
How refreshing might that be?
Always involves other people, with the possible exception of working out (though I think doing it with others helps that too but I needed "me time" back then and so I exercised alone, by choice)
Unfortunately I see a lot of solo activities that guys seem to choose for GAL and I think they/you miss a valuable experience. They stay in their comfort zone, and they don't see the problem with that.
As for saying "please" and "thank you", hey, all I can go by is how you speak to your wife, vis a vis HERE. I don't think you are a jerk. No one said you are but it's interesting that seems to be what you heard...(???)
Look, I don't know you and I have not met you or seen you interact with anyone, let alone your wife.
But at times your own words can indict you.
Your verbatim copy of the conversation with your wife (well, I think it was verbatim)
did reveal some deep wrinkles in your approach.
Those wrinkles were there a few months back, and are still there. That's what I mean by stubborn. And it concerns me.
Either you are stubborn, or you are not getting what we mean, which is why we are hammering it a lot. Or...??
We believe you are not getting it, as opposed to just ignoring us.
To sum up the deal with that last interaction with your wife, a lot was covered by Adinva. Do you get what she was saying?
Your message was NOT clear and absolutely DID place an expectation on her.
Then Your subsequent comments reflected the reality that you do NOT in fact care what she is doing at a given time. YOU SAID THAT...
that's not you being independent...it's an attitude and belief system you have,
about HER time being of less value than yours.
It's your assumption that whatever you are doing is inherently more important than what she is doing unless she can overcome that presumption.
And you still see nothing Off about that belief system...so that's either you being stubborn, or you not getting what we mean,
or a choice to go on as before.
M: 57 H: 60 M: 35 yrs S30,D28,D19 H off to Alaska 2006 Recon 7/07- 8/08 *2016* X = "ALASKA 2.0" GROUND HOG DAY I File D 10/16 OW DIV 2/26/2018 X marries OW 5/2016
