Just because I don't cry for a day doesn't mean I'm any better emotionally. It seems to be twice as strong the next.

I haven't seen my S16 or D18 or W in almost 2 weeks. At least 10 days. Other than when I saw S & D and they shunned me. S has returned 2 text messages I think regarding his whereabouts.

W agreed we could meet this week to "discuss the situation" re:S and what's best for him. Without L or mediation. My assumption is she got L, so she wants what she wants and assumes I'll disagree and doesn't care what I think is best for S.

I will be asking also what her further intentions are with L, to possibly get some direct communication for once. I also want to know if she's considered the lifelong ramifications of a D.

I am using terse language to try to avoid getting emotional.

I am as fearful now as I was the first time we met after bomb drop.

C is unavailable this week due to my work schedule. Probably will visit pastor tomorrow. I'm looking for wisdom. I am mad as a hornet, still want to save the M.

Me 46 W 43
S 21 D 18 S 17
M 22 yrs
Discovered OM 9/10/12
W moved to sister's 9/15/12
W moved to OM 9/27/12
Tried to DB until 7/13
W filed 10/7/13. Did not serve.
I counter filed 12/2/13.