You'll sometimes hear us refer to this as "letting go of the rope".
We can not control someone else, really. I am sure you know that, it is just hard. Something deep within human nature begs us to control. It's instinctual. Yet, at the end of the day, she will leave... or not... not by what you do or don't do, but by her choice.
One thing that becomes clear with WAS or MLCers is... they assume the road out is easy. Once they realize what they have to do, their resolve does not seem so clear.
Just the obstacles to leave can help them change their minds.
So, let her do the work if she wants to leave or she wants to D. If there is ever a time you need to act on something such as a response to D, then you will need to do so, within the constraints of time set out by the order. You always have time for due diligence. You may not be M, but there is the financial dissolution that will have to be dealt with just the same, as will custody need to be dealt with.
In the mean time, work on yourself. If she decides to stay, you need to be the best man and father you can be. She could stay and remain unhappy. So being detached and focused on your own growth can change the sitch enough that she decides to change herself and work on your R.
