It's a lot to take in, but you need to protect yourself financially. I'm glad to see that you are finally starting to move forward. Just because you are seeking financial assistance, per se, doesn't mean you are closing the door. You are trying to ensure that he is held accountable and has some responsibility towards you and the children. After all, they are his children too. He needs to face the consequences of his actions and one of those actions is stepping up to the plate and ensuring that his children have what they need to continue their current lifestyle, i.e., education, medical insurance, sports, etc. You can't carry the entire load yourself, nor should you.
You will need to learn to keep this as a business transaction for now and leave the emotions out of it. When people are emotional, they tend to make mistakes and get screwed over in the legal arena. Keep your focus on you and your boys and what you need to survive.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
