Portia, If you are trying to set a timeline for yourself, set it for July (not to contact him). It's really not that far away and I think you can do this w/o any problem. Yes, you will become more peaceful as time goes by and there isn't any contact w/the mlcer. Why? Because your contact w/him will not be stirring up all of the memories/emotions that you have for this man. As for him...his mind works differently. Right now, he most likely doesn't realize how much time has lapsed. Their clocks runs slower than ours and that's why it's important that we not focus on how long it's been. Why? Because life is speeding by and there are so many things happening each and every day and when he does surface again, things will have changed so much in the here and now.
Try not to focus on how long it's been. The old saying "a watched pot never boils" is so true. Put that pot on the stove and let is simmer until he's cooked up nicely.
Portia, keep the focus on you!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
