[in_it]

Much better mindset the last 24 hours since yesterday morning.

Late last night I heard H talking to OW on speaker phone. I had been asleep & woke up a few hours later. It was after midnight. H wasn't in bed yet, I went to check on him & that's when I heard him on the phone.

They were talking about how their last few hours on Friday together were amazing. Gag. H was saying that he thought the few days they got to spend together eventhough their time was limited really brought their connection deeper. Gag. Knowing I shouldn't be listening & couldn't really take much more anyhow I walked into the room as if I didn't know he was on the phone & asked him when he was coming to bed. He was in shock & looked devistated. He set there in silence for a second & said in not very long. I turned & walked away & heard her say I thought you slept in separate beds. I didn't stick around to hear the rest of the conversation, but H was in bed about 10 minutes later.

I know I shouldn't have done that, but I couldn't keep my mouth shut. H didn't go to church this morning & he has been crazy texting ever since we got home. We go to early church & have been home a little over 2 hours now.

The next time H is scheduled to travel is the week of June 3rd. I'm going to keep a PMA until then & not initiate any conversation other than normal everyday talk. I hope we can maybe come closer together during this time & have a peaceful time together.

In the past when they have to be away from each other for this long I think it has helped us.