I still like blue, what else?

[albamarie]

My Sat was met w/an angry H who is still reeling from the last few days, no real reason other the the spew he spat outside. He spat to my S24 who passed by h in the driveway, ( this is the S less willing to walk away from his F) about society, God, evil, death, life sux! I have not spoken to H all day, yea me!

I did however have to go on his cell history on line because he lost his clients number for Monday's gig I saw for the first time in forever just how many times a day/ night H calls ea and vise versa. OMG! It was as bad as a teenage girl and her bff's. And, if he's not calling her, he's checking his voicemail!

What is that? I think he has spoken to her in 2yrs more than me spoken to me, ever. He denies that, he said he speaks to me much more and about more things. He says she doesn't know too much! It's just crazy repetitive sh!t that he thrives on w/her. But why so much?

I am so glad this is not giving me anxiety, it's to stupid to care about!

I over heard him listening to his VM, he forgot windows are open now, she was saying she was worried because he didn't call her (in like 6hrs). She said she knows he shouldn't anyway because I don't want him to though they are not sexual or dating, she wants what's best for him because they are friends. She totally knows how to manipulate him!

This is not the road to fixing anything in his life, he is stuck/content is his ways! I am introducing the word D into my vocab and thoughts so I can ease into the realization of my sitch. This is getting easier and I am getting more comfortable with the word everyday.

Funny, I could leave him this night, but the word D sends/sent shivers down my spine. Gonna work on that one some more.... more baby steps!