I'm quite happy with what I sent. It doesn't require a reply either.
M36 W31 S4 S2 T5 M4 BD Jan12 S July12 Recon Sep12-Nov12 ILBINILWY Jan13 OM x 2 in 2013 W wants R July 13 I start D. Jan 14. Meet GF Nov 13 Have I changed enough? Jul 14
What you sent was good, what you suggested earlier was very clingy and pursuing, and would probably have pushed her away. Not sending a text today would NOT have ended your chances; be cautious when you feel anxiety driving you toward unrecommended actions (unsolicited text, pursuit, relationship talks).
Adinva 51, S20, S18 M24 total 6/15/11-12/1/12 From IDLY to H moving out 9/15/15-3/7/17 From negotiating SA to final D at age 50 5/8/17-now: New relationship with an old friend __ Happiness is a warm puppy.
Hi T, yeah, I'm glad you did a little tinkering with the wording before you sent the text. What you wrote was nice a neutral, stating your needs but reassuring her that you are still open to communication. Nicely done, IMHO. It's a far cry fromwhat you might've written earlier this week, so that sounds positive. It seems as if you're at least thinking clearly enough now to notdo anything that would put future reconciliation in jeopardy -- if that's still you're goal. I applaud you, mate, you're functioning in a healthy way despite some serious emotional turmoil. Keep it up. And definitely get some feedback here if you're unsure how W will respond.
It's funny, your W's responses almost make her sound likea LBS, with all the temperature taking and angry response when you chose not to rresond immediately. You can take from that the awareness that you're in more of a position of power right now. Let that give you the courage to get your own needs met and set some boundaries where appropriate/necessary.
M41 W42 M 12 T 15 S10, D9, twin Ds 3 1/2 BD 1/2/2013 Living as roommates Working on D agreement w. mediator 5/13
What you sent was good, what you suggested earlier was very clingy and pursuing, and would probably have pushed her away. Not sending a text today would NOT have ended your chances; be cautious when you feel anxiety driving you toward unrecommended actions (unsolicited text, pursuit, relationship talks).
Your right. It felt very important to me yesterday to give her a sign that I wasn't done. It was panic based and I'm glad I toned the message down.
M36 W31 S4 S2 T5 M4 BD Jan12 S July12 Recon Sep12-Nov12 ILBINILWY Jan13 OM x 2 in 2013 W wants R July 13 I start D. Jan 14. Meet GF Nov 13 Have I changed enough? Jul 14
Hi T, yeah, I'm glad you did a little tinkering with the wording before you sent the text. What you wrote was nice a neutral, stating your needs but reassuring her that you are still open to communication. Nicely done, IMHO. It's a far cry fromwhat you might've written earlier this week, so that sounds positive. It seems as if you're at least thinking clearly enough now to notdo anything that would put future reconciliation in jeopardy -- if that's still you're goal. I applaud you, mate, you're functioning in a healthy way despite some serious emotional turmoil. Keep it up. And definitely get some feedback here if you're unsure how W will respond.
It's funny, your W's responses almost make her sound likea LBS, with all the temperature taking and angry response when you chose not to rresond immediately. You can take from that the awareness that you're in more of a position of power right now. Let that give you the courage to get your own needs met and set some boundaries where appropriate/necessary.
Thanks P, I can't stand far enough back to see her almost sound like a LBS or see any position of power right now. It's good to hear a 3rd party perspective.
M36 W31 S4 S2 T5 M4 BD Jan12 S July12 Recon Sep12-Nov12 ILBINILWY Jan13 OM x 2 in 2013 W wants R July 13 I start D. Jan 14. Meet GF Nov 13 Have I changed enough? Jul 14
Text Wife: I hope no matter what...we always get along for the sake of the kids.
May the 4th be with you all today!
:-)
T1000: :-) May the 4th be with you too!
(chatted about kids for a little and both sent random funny pics for the next hour) End of text.
Not quite sure what "no matter what..." means. Trying not to think about it.
Having a good day with the kids. Bought them a little basketball hoop. If the weather keeps up I'll take them out somewhere. My parents are having them tomorrow afternoon, gonna chill out for a few hours and then try running again but plan a shorter route this time.
I'm in a fitness frame of mind at the moment. I'm already in great shape, hopefully will get the look I've always wanted this year.
M36 W31 S4 S2 T5 M4 BD Jan12 S July12 Recon Sep12-Nov12 ILBINILWY Jan13 OM x 2 in 2013 W wants R July 13 I start D. Jan 14. Meet GF Nov 13 Have I changed enough? Jul 14
W phones me to ask her opinion on a car she was offered at a garage when she was getting her car fixed. I was so tempted to ask how she can afford to change her car after all that text the other day about needing money but held it in. Gave her the advice she needed, she thanked me because they were trying to totally rip her off. She offered up that she was off to see her sister next.
Quite happy with the conversation.
Right, back to me and the kids, it's not raining, gonna take them out.
M36 W31 S4 S2 T5 M4 BD Jan12 S July12 Recon Sep12-Nov12 ILBINILWY Jan13 OM x 2 in 2013 W wants R July 13 I start D. Jan 14. Meet GF Nov 13 Have I changed enough? Jul 14
W phones me to ask her opinion on a car she was offered at a garage when she was getting her car fixed. I was so tempted to ask how she can afford to change her car after all that text the other day about needing money but held it in. Gave her the advice she needed, she thanked me because they were trying to totally rip her
Did she say she got a quote because she was thinking of selling it?
M37 H36 M8 T12 inc 3yr L-dist 7/12:H broke down 10/12:H dad D frm W4. BD soon after 1/13:H wants to leave 2/13:H gpa passed. Feels closer but H still leaving 3/13: S begins
T1000, haven't had a chance to read up on you but I noticed there is more communication w your w. how did it get to that point? Are you guys living together?
M 43 W 35 S 6 BD 7-11 Served 5-2-13 Sep agree signed 5-12-14 Wife moves out pending refinance 5-14-14 Divorce hearing set May 2 Divorced May 2
W phones me to ask her opinion on a car she was offered at a garage when she was getting her car fixed. I was so tempted to ask how she can afford to change her car after all that text the other day about needing money but held it in. Gave her the advice she needed, she thanked me because they were trying to totally rip her
Did she say she got a quote because she was thinking of selling it?
Yes, she wants to change her car. Said she was fed up with her ar she has now, I said join the club. A bit frustrating to hear considering her last current car still isn't paid off on my credit card. I don't see how she can possibly manage to.
So the text I got the other day was either legit and she is in complete dreamland wanting to get a car. Or that text was just bait?
M36 W31 S4 S2 T5 M4 BD Jan12 S July12 Recon Sep12-Nov12 ILBINILWY Jan13 OM x 2 in 2013 W wants R July 13 I start D. Jan 14. Meet GF Nov 13 Have I changed enough? Jul 14
