BRNR, I don't see any harm in what you are proposing, but how will this affect you and your well being? Will this confuse the boys even more?
I think I would broach the subject w/h and see what he says.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
