It's a set back in your sitch for sure. I screamed similar stuff at my W in November. She won't care about what you say to the same degree it's upsetting you. She also knows your upset. Time will help it fade away.
Imo do not tell her how you know about stuff because of snooping. It will set you back even further. Just say it doesn't matter how you found out and stick to your guns. It might even get her mind curious about you.
M36 W31 S4 S2 T5 M4 BD Jan12 S July12 Recon Sep12-Nov12 ILBINILWY Jan13 OM x 2 in 2013 W wants R July 13 I start D. Jan 14. Meet GF Nov 13 Have I changed enough? Jul 14